'Merson

So we recently passed a fun milestone. Our son Emerson is now 11 months old. I thought I was getting pretty good at this parenting thing until we got a second one. Ellery isn't exactly the calmest soul on the planet but at least there was just one of her.

That said though, there are some definite things I've learned over the last year about kids and myself that I didn't know before we had the second one.

1. The whole nurture over nature thing is limited. It's crazy just how different Emerson and Ellery are from each other. And it's noticeable in a bunch of small ways. Like getting dressed. In general, Ellery seemed to enjoy getting dressed when she was 1. At least she cooperated a bit. Emerson reacts as if we're trying to poke him full of needles. He also enjoys music but not near to the extent that Ellery did/does. She would often stop everything she was doing so that she could listen to a particular song. Like "I'm Gonna Be" by the Proclaimers.

2. Sleep is a luxury my wife doesn't get right now. She has always had the insane ability to be able to wake up at the drop of a hat when one of the kids is fussy. She will routinely get up to settle the kids down and I won't even be aware that the kids were even awake. I try. I really do. But Christina has the equivalent of a superpower that I do not possess. I do not know if she considers it a superpower or a curse though.

3. I've been doing more thinking about what kid of lessons I want Emerson to internalize simply because he's a boy. Sometimes these are different lessons from what I give Ellery. There is definitely a prominent person in American politics that I do not want him Emulating. I want him to see the value in being thoughtful, considerate, and wise. There are a lot of people who think male strength lies in being assertive or loud, but I want him to see that true leadership cannot occur without empathy.

And it's not just that I think empathy is important to being a good person. It's a straight-up employable skill. Markiplier has thousands of followers on Youtube not because he's funny, but because he is very good at connecting with his audience and conveying emotion. Donald Trump is in a heap of trouble right now over comments he made 11 years ago because he is really, really bad at SHOWING HE'S SORRY. I imagine he hasn't had much practice doing that.